Author Archives: Suzan

About Suzan

menstrual activist , alternative product advocate, TSS survivor

Confident Carry

The Galesburg teen who was suspended for concealed carry (of menstrual supplies) shed light on a problem that sadly still plagues us – a lack of confidence among those who menstruate and a lack of understanding among those who do not.

Social taboos and menstrual myths abound and affect all.

Rules are established – and followed – without real consideration to the needs of half (and perhaps over half) of the population of a school…group…gathering…attendees of functions….

Special needs? No, I’m talking about normal needs.  Needs and the rights to meet those needs in a way that does not invade privacy or bring undo attention to the individual.

For a menstruating teen to be told she must obtain a medical permission slip from her doctor in order to carry a small purse containing feminine hygiene needs smacks of sex based discrimination. It’s demeaning, degrading, indefensible, and an invasion of privacy.

Schools should be a place where all students feel confident with themselves and within themselves.  Bullying is against the rules…but administrators can tell a menstruating girl that she must have a doctor’s slip if she’s to be given permission to carry concealed feminine products? And, she’s suspended when she doesn’t?  Hmmm….

These taboos place hardships on girls and undermine their confidence instead of providing practical wisdom that gives them wings and encourages them to fly high.

Oh, how I wish all girls and women felt confident enough with their menstruation to confident carry – to carry their menstrual products in such a way that they are in plain view without embarrassment and with total disregard to the social norms.  Maybe you are willing to give this a try on May 9 as a part of Confident Carry Day.

Menstruation is not a medical disorder to be ashamed of.  It’s a normal occurrence that we should all embrace, fully, completely, confidently.

#May9  #ConfidentCarry

Concealed Carry

A day ago I posted Concealed Carry or Confident Carry? and suggested the girls at Galesburg High School confident carry until the rule banning purses was rescinded, and ended with a call for a day of confident carry for us all on May 9.

In some instances and settings, concealed carry is not possible and confident carry could generate negative and unwanted attention.  So, in light of that, let me say this:

Menstrual cups rock concealed carry as well as confident carry.

Why?  How?

Menstrual cups can be carried within even before your period starts.  That’s concealed carry as well as confident carry!

What a difference it could have made for the Galesburg High School student, suspended for concealed carry of menstrual supplies, if someone had shared with her the wonders of menstrual cups.

Lunette, SoftCup, Keeper, DivaCup, and others offer a safe, discrete concealed carry option (internal) that other menstrual products can’t.  Cups are a great option whether you are new to menstruation or have years, or even decades of experience.

For more information on menstrual cups, click on the links above / contact the companies via email or through social media, visit the Menstrual Cup Support forum, and read Why it’s time to give ’em a try.

Concealed carry shouldn’t put you in suspension at school or prevent you from doing what you love.

#ConfidentCarry  #May9

Concealed Carry or Confident Carry?

The recent suspension of a 17 year old girl for carrying a purple clutch containing feminine hygiene supplies caught my attention.  It reminded me of the “all clear” rule enacted last year by the NFL.  However, this goes a step farther and bans everything that would allow students to conceal anything.

That anything includes feminine hygiene products.  Apparently the Principal’s position is that teenage girls should feel confident enough to place their feminine hygiene needs in a clear bag for all the world to see and carry it with them to class throughout the days they are menstruating, or expect to become menstrual.

And, perhaps that’s what these girls should do until this rule is struck down. Perhaps the girls should band together and bring feminine hygiene products in a clear confident carry bag every day whether they are menstruating or not.

I wish all girls and women were so confident in themselves and with menstruation that they were comfortable doing just that.  It would go a long way in ending the embarrassment that so often (and unnecessarily) accompanies things period wise.

And, it would also put an end to the idiotic assumption that menstruation requires a doctor’s permission slip because it’s a medical issue.

A medical issue?  Um…the last time I checked the definition of “medical” it said the word related to the treatment of illness and/or injury.

Menstruation is NEITHER.

It’s a normal function of the female body.  Treating it as anything otherwise is ignorant and sexist.  It’s demeaning, degrading, indefensible, and, it smacks of sex-based discrimination.

I call for a day of confident carry on May 9 to raise awareness about the plight of menstruating girls and women everywhere.  Let’s end these ridiculous menstrual taboos and stereotypical assumptions about those who menstruate.  Let’s put a stop to the assassination of confident menstrual lifestyles by those who assure us they mean well and that it’s for our own good.

Girls at Galesburg High, and in schools across the land, are you willing to band together in support of your right to menstruate confidently, whether privately or publicly, as YOU choose and not as it’s chosen for you?  Join me in carrying feminine hygiene products where all can see on May 9.

Period wise women buck the norm.  What’s your norm and are you brave enough to step out of it for just one day for confident carry?

They’re Your Hormones – Make Them Work FOR You

It was the day of my big photo shoot…a day I had awaited with both anxiety and eagerness. I wanted to look good…to feel good – not only physically, but mentally – about who I am.

It was my first time to experience a professional photo shoot.  To make sure everything would be camera friendly, the photographer had arranged for a makeup artist / hair stylist to touch me up.

(Okay…okay…it was a make over.)

I had painstakingly chosen the outfits I would take for the shoot.  For two weeks, I had carefully chosen the foods I would eat, had worked my body…had done everything I could to make sure I would be in top form.

Guess what happened. (Check out the picture above for a clue – and no…that’s not of me.)

The morning of the shoot, I woke groggy and puffy-eyed.  A quick look in the mirror told me this was more than just bed face.

Two zits had appeared during the night. One highlighted my left cheek and the other was just shy of center on my chin.  My face was puffy…I looked like I’d gained 10 pounds in the night.

What the…?

I stepped onto the scale…my weight WAS up…three pounds.  How did that happen?  It was impossible!

My stomach gurgled and I realized she was bloated.

BLOATED!

How would those slim, tight slacks I’d chosen to wear fit me?  WOULD they fit me?

As I rubbed my tummy I realized I was swollen all over.  My hands, my face, my stomach, my…breasts….

Yep, they had increased in size and were sore.

Full breasts – now that’s something I’m usually grateful for, but that morning I wasn’t.  The shirts I’d picked for the shoot were form fitting.  There was no room in them for my newly enlarged breasts.

NO ROOM!  I would pop the buttons.

I panicked.

All the work I’d put into preparing my body and mind was for naught.  My hormones changed as I’d slept and undid every bit of the work I’d done.

Physically, I was a wreck.

Emotionally, I was…well…let’s not go there.

The photo shoot was scheduled for late afternoon so there was hope that some of the bloating would pass.  And, with each cup of coffee I drank, it did.

The change in hormones, combined with the amount of coffee I drank, triggered my body to eliminate and by the time I left my house for the drive to the studio, I was feeling (and looking) more the me I wished to be for the shoot.

I couldn’t help but laugh at myself.  I had covered all the bases, taken everything possible into the planning of my prep for my photo shoot.  Well, almost everything.

I’d forgotten one very important thing…my cycle and the effect stress can have on it.

I was diet wise.

I was exercise wise.

I was style wise.

But, I wasn’t cycle wise.

Period wise planning takes all things into consideration…especially where you are in your cycle, how your hormones are affecting you, and includes having a backup plan in case Aunt Flo unexpectedly sends her hormonal baggage ahead of her arrival.

How did the photo shoot go?

I was gorgeous, of course!

An artist needs only a willing canvas and I was oh so willing!  The photographer found my good side (yes, I have one), and the hormonal change that had occurred in the night brought out the best me possible and it was captured in every picture taken.

Want a little period wise advise? Schedule a make over and photo shoot.  You may discover a you that you want to lean hard into being more often.

Be period wise.  Don’t just go with the flow…make those hormones work for you!

What’s Your Cycle Day (CD) and Why You Should Know

If I asked you, “What’s your CD,” could you tell me?

Could you tell me without looking at the calendar when your last period started? (That day would be CD 1.)

Why should you know your CD?

How else can you live fully in it and lean hard into it?

Each CD has its own strengths.  If you don’t know what your CD is how will you know how to plan for and use each CD’s strengths to the max?

For women who cycle, especially those cycling naturally (not using hormonal birth control), knowing your CD and the strengths that belong to it can empower you in ways that may surprise you.

I challenge you – keep a brief journal each day of your cycle for one month.  Record the strengths that you note on each day.

Perhaps on one day you want to organize or clean house. Another day, you may prefer to write.  And another cycle day, you may feel chatty.  You may find that there are days that indicate it would be good to start a diet and other CDs can alert you to stay away from the kitchen or you will eat everything in sight.

Knowing what CD you can expect which strengths to surface on and when to expect them to be the strongest can be empowering.

Give it a try.

Be period wise.

(Looking for a fun way to track your cycle?  Check out Val Carey’s TOTM Period Planner.)

Concealed Carry Holster

What do you do when you’re out and about in a skirt and need to keep menstrual products handy, but don’t want to carry a purse?

What about a lace garter that could easily double as a tampon / pad / cup  / wipe holster garter?

(Click here for more information.)

Most of us prefer concealed carry when it comes to feminine needs.

Thinking outside the box can open the door to intriguing ideas and provide simple solutions.

Be period wise. Be open to new ideas and solutions outside the ordinary.

 

 

 

 

How Well Do You Know Her?

How much do you love her? And, how well do you know her?

Which “her” am I referring to?

Your her – that’s who.

Your body, that is.

Do you love her? Care for her? Know her?

Have you explored every little nook and cranny, bump and depression, protrusion and deep cavern? Do you know her ups and downs, ins and outs…know her up and down, inside and outside?

If not…why not?  You should.  Makes no difference what your mother, father, teacher, preacher…told you.

She’s your her and she’s yours to love.  That means she’s your responsibility to keep safe, clean, well and happy.

No one can love and care for her like you can.  And, no one can know her as well as you.

If you don’t, who will?

Oh, don’t depend on your doctor to know her well. Your doctor goes by what he/she sees of her and hears of her…hears of her from your own words via your own explanations and understanding.

If you don’t know her how will you know when she’s ailing or not quite normal?

How will you know when things go wrong with her?  How will you know what makes her happy?  How will you know how to fix what’s wrong or change what she doesn’t like?

Menstruation is a good time to start getting to know her on a more personal level.  Seriously.

And, continue throughout each day of your cycle.  Learn of her. Get to know her…all of her.

You’ll be glad you did.

Be period wise. Be body wise. Be HER wise.

Why Try a New Product?

I’m often asked, “Why would I want to try a different menstrual product if I’m happy with the one I’m using?”

My reply?  “Why wouldn’t you?”

All too often we settle for what is because of fear.

Yep.  Fear.

  • I’m afraid I won’t like it.
  • I’m afraid it will be money wasted.
  • I’m afraid it will be a waste of time.
  • I’m afraid I will have issues with leaks.
  • I’m afraid I won’t be able to use a…(cup, sponge, tampon, cloth pad, ultra thin pad, pad with wings…)
  • I’m afraid it won’t work for me.

How will you know if you don’t try?

When did we become afraid to try new things? Hey, we’re women! We’re fearless!  We LOVE new things!

New shoes, new purses, new hair styles, new clothes, new panties, new cars, new friends, new experiences, new social media groups….

We’re all about change and innovation.  So, why do we stick with the same old menstrual product year after year after year?

Hey, I have friends who are still using the SAME product they began using when young teenagers.  Times have changed.  Bodies have changed.  Menstrual needs change. And, so do menstrual products.

I’ll bet you have shoes for every event and activity – work, church, play, exercise, beach, pool…and I’m guessing you have one menstrual product (at best two) that you have used for years and years.

Question – what will you do when the company stops making them…changes them…store stops carrying them?

(I remember the panic I felt when OB Ultras were not available.)

Take a look at what’s out there. Don’t be afraid. Remember – you are fearless! And, truly, there’s nothing to fear.

And, while I’m on this soapbox, encourage the girls in your life to explore and experience many options.  Don’t let them settle for just one. And, don’t let them be afraid to try new products. Encourage menstrual openness and creativity via all the options available. Menstrual fear should not be a part of their experience.

Why try a new product?  Because your period is worth it!  And, so are you!

Besides, It’s period wise!

PMS or SDC

We all know that PMS stands for PreMenstrual Syndrome.

(Or, Plain Mean Sometimes…Potty Mouth Screaming…Period Mood Swings…Pass Me the Shotgun…Perpetual Munching Spree…Puffy MidSection…Plainly Men Suck…Pimples May Surface…Potential Murder Suspect…)

My senior adult mom and I were watching TV together and an ad came on asking the question: “Do you struggle with PMS?”

Mom replied immediately. “I’ve never had PMS in my life!”

I looked at her in shock and disbelief.  After all, I spent the first 20 years of my life in her house.  I knew about her mood swings and I knew they were cyclical.

My reply?  “What the heck? What do you mean you’ve never had PMS in your life?  You’re joking…right?”

Memory after memory sprang to mind of her with PMS…scary….

Mom’s reply was: “No! I’m not kidding. I’ve never had PMS in my life – ever.  Your dad said numerous times that he could tell when my period was going to start because I turned mean a few days beforehand.  But, that was just him talking.  I wasn’t aware of any changes in how I acted or felt.  I do know that he got on my nerves more at some times than he did at others and I assumed HE was the one with the problem…not me.  Certainly NOT me!”

I laughed…out loud…loud and long.

“What’s so funny?” she asked.

“You are!” I replied. ‘You’ve never had PMS a day in your life?”

“NEVER!” She insisted and then went on, “PMS is all hype.  It’s an excuse for being yourself. It’s like when people drink a little too much alcohol and say and do things they wouldn’t ordinarily and they blame the alcohol. Women act up or act out of character and blame it on PMS saying ‘I can’t help it, I have PMS.’. In reality, they can help it, they just don’t want to help it. Maybe a change in hormones at that time of the month uninhibits them and allows the real ‘them’ to come out. Maybe they see it as a time to say what’s been on their mind all month long and set some things straight.”

She continued. “They simply don’t care.”

I stared at her as my mind recalled time after time after time of times when she said what was “on her mind” and “set things straight.”

“Simply don’t care, huh?” I asked.

“Yep,” was her reply.

“And, you’ve never had a moment of PMS in your whole life?” I quizzed again.

“Nope!” was her response. Then she continued. “I never blamed my actions or reactions on an acronym or on my hormones. I was who I was and I took responsibility for what I said.  It wasn’t PMS talking.  That was me. All month long, every day of the month…I was myself. I didn’t need to hide behind PMS.  I was comfortable saying what I thought and being who I was all the time. And, if those few days before my period started freed me a little to be even more myself…then so be it. I welcomed it!”

I silently contemplated my mother’s words. Hormonally speaking, I was in the more agreeable portion of my cycle.  There would be no argument…not from me. That’s not who I was that day.

That day I was in more of a contemplative mood….  This conversation happened several weeks ago – well before Christmas – and it’s still on my mind now.

Simply Don’t Care – is that what really happens to so many of us premenstrually? Do we really not care and use PMS as a cover for unleashing who we really are?

Hmmm…perhaps.  And, perhaps not.

I do know that during those few days when premenstrual, I can be a bear (no put down to bears intended) and lash out at those I love the most.  I can’t seem to help myself…stop myself… but the truth is it’s far easier to give in those feelings that seem/are so close to the surface, so eager to come up and out….

When I feel irritable inside…body and mind, I don’t mind spreading the irritability around.  And, when premenstrual, oh, yes…I’m willing (if not eager) to share my irritation with anyone who rubs up against me…or rubs me the wrong way.

And, at the time I feel like I’m being my usual self and all the world has gone crazy.  I feel more true to myself than at any other time.  Now…that’s a scary thought! 😉

Could I control myself? Yes. But, it would take effort and forethought.

Would I want to?

Heck no!

In fact, I wouldn’t even give control a thought.  Easier to react than to act, I would choose to unleash the beast.

Sad.

I could tell those around me, “I’m uptight and need some alone/quiet time” and seek space of my own to find solace and enable my mind to calm and me to regain control of myself, my emotions, my actions…my tongue.

Finding peace in the chaos of SDC or PMS is not easy, but I believe it is possible.

PMS should serve as a reminder of the need for a Pro Menstruation Management System (PMMS).

Before my hormones can send me into PMS overdrive and I SDC, I’m going do all I can to be pro menstruation and manage my intake, uptake (stress/rest/food/drink/medication/vitamins/activities/etc) and outflow systematically throughout my cycle by using a PMMS.

What does a PMMS look like?

Check back in a few days.  That’s my next blog post!

Toxic Shock Syndrome (TSS) Awareness Campaign

Friday, January 10, 2014 at 2 pm ET, people are coming together on Twitter for #PeriodTalk. (that’s 1 pm CT, 12 pm MT, 11 am PT)

This month the #PeriodTalk TweetChat will focus on raising awareness about tampon related Toxic Shock Syndrome (aka TSS).

You ARE Loved, a non profit dedicated to raising awareness about tampon related TSS will be the guest and will be tweeting as @youarelovedTSS.  Be Prepared Period will be the host and will tweet as @bpreparedperiod.

This hour long event will offer information about Toxic Shock Syndrome via tweets, advice on how to avoid it and what to do if you (or someone you know) develop symptoms. And, there will be time for questions and comments.

It’s period wise for women, as well as men, to be aware of TSS and its symptoms. Young girls, teens and young women are at the greatest risk and often mistake it for the flu. Know the facts and know how to get help for yourself or for a friend/family member if symptoms arise.

If you’re not familiar with TweetChats or want more information about #PeriodTalk, drop by Be Prepared Period’s site and find out how it all works.  It’s an awesome chat…a period wise chat. And, it happens the second Friday of each month.

Hope to see you there!

#TSSawareness   #periodtalk   #womenshealth   #periodwise  #TSS